[Tlhingan-hol] Indie Movie translation

[De'vID]

On 22 July 2015 at 15:58, Chelsea Knauf <chelsea.knauf at gmail.com> wrote:
> The phrase is "Green light, green light.  Dweller on the threshold come reap
> my vengeance".

> My beginner attempt at translation: {wovwI' SuD, wovwI' SuD.  bortaSwIj
> yItIv lojmitDaq DabwI'}

That's actually a really good translation already. I have some
suggestions though.

First, the verb {Dab} already includes the sense of "at/in", and so
doesn't need {-Daq}:
http://klingonska.org/canon/search/?file=1999-07-19c-email.txt&q=Dab

{wovmoHwI'} has been used for "light" in canon (on the Bird of Prey
poster - {tel wovmoHwI'} "wing light"). Does the gem produce its own
light? Does it brighten other things? Another possibility is {naghboch
SuD}.

Is the space between dimensions connected by a door, or a corridor? In
that case, {'och} or {chob} might be more appropriate. If it (he?
she?) dwells near one opening or another, you might even say {DIn
DabwI'} or {qa'rI' DabwI'}, for example.

Finally, {tIv} suggests enjoyment. Is that the right word for "reap"?
I'd think that it's more like carrying out a duty or command, e.g.,
{loH} or {ta'}.

Other than the {-Daq}, though, I think your translation is good
without any changes.

-- 
De'vID