[Tlhingan-hol] Story: ghuv = The Recruit - 43

[Robyn Stewart]

Torg has just taken two shots to the belly from an unknown weapon.
Translation, explanation and increasingly rambling author's notes follow the
next excerpt.
---
nechDI' mIr, bIng QIDaq chol. QI lIt 'e' nID torgh 'ach luj. QI veb SIch 'e'
nIDDI' torgh, Hoch HuvHa'choHmoHmo' SeS, QI SamlaHbe'. rInDI' mIr, pay' pagh
'uch torgh. pumtaHvIS, mIqta' Sar 'uchchoH 'ach lujtaH. pay' DubDaj jon
vay'. jeqbogh baSDaq HuS yoDSut. vay' 'uchchoHmeH tlhe''eghDI' torgh,
yoychoH. yoDSutvo' pum 'ej muDDaq nogh torgh. tagha' choQ qIp. yIntaH 'ach
Qamrupbe'. 
---
nechDI' mIr, bIng QIDaq chol.  I've been using chol transitively, but a
recent discussion made me reconsider. There's no "to" in the gloss. Do you
think because in English I can say "I near the table," in Klingon raS
vIchollaH'a'?  I think this way with -Daq might be safer. "When the chain
moved laterally, it neared a bridge below."

QI lIt 'e' nID torgh 'ach luj.  QI lIt = "he gets on the bridge;  X 'e' nID
= "he tries to X"; "Torg tries to get on the bridge but he fails." 

QI veb SIch 'e' nIDDI' torgh, Hoch HuvHa'choHmoHmo' SeS, QI SamlaHbe'.
There's the <'e' nID> construction again, this time with -DI' on it. QI veb
SIch = He reaches the next bridge.  Huv = it is  clear, unobstructed; HuvHa'
= it is obscured; HuvHa'choH = it becomes obscured; HuvHa'choHmoH = it
causes it to become obscured; HuvHa'choHmoHmo' = because it causes it to
become obscured;  "When Torg tries to reach the next bridge, because steam
obscured everything he couldn't find the bridge."

 rInDI' mIr, pay' pagh 'uch torgh. = "When the chain ends, suddenly Torg
holds nothing."

pumtaHvIS, mIqta' Sar 'uchchoH 'ach lujtaH. = "As he falls he grabs onto
various machinery, but he continuously fails."

pay' DubDaj jon vay'. = "Suddenly something captures his back."

jeqbogh baSDaq HuS yoDSut. ="The armoured suit hangs on protruding metal."

vay' 'uchchoHmeH tlhe''eghDI' torgh, yoychoH.  ="When Torg turns himself to
grab onto something, he goes upside-down."

yoDSutvo' pum 'ej muDDaq nogh torgh. ="Torgh falls out of the armoured suit
and writhes in the air."

tagha' choQ qIp. "Finally he hits the deck."

yIntaH 'ach Qamrupbe'. ="He is still alive but not ready to stand." I
suppose I really mean wej QammeH laHDaj Dajrupbe' or even QamlaHbe'chu'
rather than Qamrupbe', but it's torgh's point of view and he's deluding
himself. I wonder if the reader can infer that.

- Qov